Andy DiCarlo:
Doesn't anything ever get you down?
Big Bob Freelander:
Yeah, I get my apple cart upset sometimes. I just learned a long time ago to accept a little less from life, that's all.
Big Bob Freelander:
[continues]
Want to know who taught me this great lesson in life? Elizabeth Taylor.
Andy DiCarlo:
[looks incredulous]
What?
Big Bob Freelander:
I never bothered to tell you the story because I don't believe in negative stories, but, uh, one time I actually had a date with old Liz herself.
Andy DiCarlo:
You're kidding.
Big Bob Freelander:
Huh-uh. Do you remember when I went off to junior college in Los Angeles? Well, I had a class with a guy that was Liz Taylor's cousin. He fixed me up with her.
Andy DiCarlo:
What was she like?
Big Bob Freelander:
I never met her.
Andy DiCarlo:
You just said...
Big Bob Freelander:
No, I just said that I had a "date" with her. I never said that she kept it. You should've seen all the preparations I made. I went out and got the best flowers that I could find, and a great table at the world-famous Cocoanut Grove restaurant. And then she never showed up. That was the weekend that she ran off and married the hotel guy.
Andy DiCarlo:
I'm sorry.
Big Bob Freelander:
Oh, you don't have to be sorry. Just that now I'm married to Roberta, and I'm happy about it. Even though she is... a little less than Elizabeth Taylor.
Big Bob Freelander:
[pauses to reflect]
God, Elizabeth Taylor was beautiful.

Film

Sorridi (1975)

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